Once upon a time, before social media, I was walking to a friend’s house who lived in my subdivision. As I was walking, I noticed what looked like a giant tortoise blocking the sidewalk. I wiped my eyes; thinking I was either hallucinating, or perhaps the neighborhood teens got high, and were up to stealing land ornaments again.
So, I approached the thing, and sure enough it moved! Then out of nowhere, a bunch of little kids came around and started hitting it with sticks.
I ran home to use the landline telephone. (Lulz) But… I was too late. The same kids who were hitting the 100 year tortoise with sticks, also has cell phones.
The Zoo arrived on the scene, and said the Tortoise escaped.
I did’t get a reward for my discovery, but it did make the paper that no one read.
The conclusion of the matter is this. Even before social media, people were so distracted and caught up in their own affairs, that they missed a giant 100 year old tortoise slowly escape from the zoo.
The zoo is in Royal Oak, my friend’s house was on 12 Mile and Stephenson Hwy — in Madison Heights! How the in holy Hell did no one see this thing? Makes me wonder, what else people don’t see?.. UFO sightings back then, chem-trails now. I think it’s fair to say that humans distract themselves by nature, with or without mass media consumption.
Whenever I think of this event, it gives me faith. I mean; if a giant leviathan can escape from the zoo at 2 miles per hour, I can easily believe God could summon some she bears from the zoo also, and save me from times of trouble.
It also makes me believe in other sightings that took place outside my bedroom window as a child, because clearly, not many have ever looked into the sky in the same direction I did.